You so…

Over the past weekend I had some news about Ibo. That the bearer of the news turned out to be dead wrong is suspicious enough, but the result was far more telling in its endeavor.
I wrote to him of course and he retorted, shocked and saying of course this wasn’t him. I could have left it at that. But with him, what once was love has become a war of chess. And we degraded into visceral sex chat. When I stopped was something he said: You so deserve to be used. Surprisingly enough, I wasn’t shocked by this. But I was angered. See, this is the true face of Ibo. This ugly jealous man who seeks out your weaknesses and exploits them to make himself feel better. It is the reason I left him to begin with.
But perhaps foolishly, I felt terrible at the notion of him being sick and returning to his home country. It is like I owe him something, because I am guilty of looking out for myself. Reality just landed at my doorstep. You so deserve to be used is who I dated, who I trusted and welcomed into my life long after I knew the truth. It is the lie I sold myself and who I am freeing out of my soul. Go back and take your darkness.
And I sent him a final parting shot. I was clear without being snarky. It wasn’t necessary to cut him down to size, because that’s who he is, but that’s not who I am.


About downszdiva

Freelance writer, blogger, foodie. Ph ilosopher, Jersey girl (not to be confused with the 'shore'). Pet sitter, lover of strong coffee.
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