Velvet Crush

Mmmmmm….I feel so good. Cut my hair, stretching towards fitness…its time to awaken. And admit…I have a deep crush on my mt. As he kneads away the stress and relaxes me, I have come to. The most torturous part is in the very beginning when he’s working on my shoulders and neck. He is inches away from my boobs. And when he does my lower back, its killer because it turns me on.
We talk more & more, and I have a huge crush on him. I would love to date him, but that would also be awkward. Its unrealistic I suppose, but I feel completely awakened from my emotional funk.
Its so difficult to go from being hurt by a man to being touched the way I have by this one. I don’t want to make this into something it isn’t. Is it so bad to dream?
I just can’t see myself going online with that pitiful bunch of crap again. Forcing myself to come up with some vapid description of myself. I just don’t want to.
And so there is this man. Yes, I am paying for him to do a service for me. But emotionally, there is so much more at stake. This is my recovery from a cold dark place. A place of tremendous pain & fear. I deserve this.

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About downszdiva

Freelance writer, blogger, foodie. Ph ilosopher, Jersey girl (not to be confused with the 'shore'). Animal rescue, lover of strong coffee.
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