Shine bright like a diamond

Rihanna’s song was finishing my Zumba cool down ,”shine bright like a diamond,” and another rewarding workout was over. But my thoughts have turned towards those reactions around me as I’m slimming down.
Luckily, I haven’t lost any close friends, but a co-worker has distanced herself from me. I try and handle it gracefully, but I am confused. I’m still the same person. My risks for diabetes and heart disease have gone down.
I still feel like that fat girl running around, feeling like I have to give excuses for my life. For as much as we change, some things stay the same. Life is a work in production. She has made complimentary remarks, but she’ll cut our conversations short and she’s stopped her usual visits to my desk.
One neighbor kept giving me food to take home at her house, guilting me with it. It would go straight in the garbage. This only started after I had lost 10.
Now, the positives far outshine the negatives. I’ve had rave reviews, the normally quiet French are looking at me more, and I get peppered with fitness and dietary questions. Guru I am not. But I am humbled by this experience and proud.


About downszdiva

Freelance writer, blogger, foodie. Ph ilosopher, Jersey girl (not to be confused with the 'shore'). Pet sitter, lover of strong coffee.
This entry was posted in Body Issues, Fitness, weight and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Shine bright like a diamond

  1. chaotican says:

    Maybe that is part of what drives us to go to extremes and become underweight! Just the defiance…

    I suspect some of this is you becoming comfortable in your new identity. The way the world looks at you will change, yes. And you’ll be stronger for it, I bet. 🙂

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